With you, Without you
by Gothgirl3000
Summary: Joker cannot stand Harley yet he cannot be without her x15 oneshots HarleyxJoker some normal and others are song based (not for sensitive readers)
1. Chapter 1

Joker was sat at his desk plotting another scheme to outdo Batman. He had a bottle of whiskey next to him to help keep him going he WOULD need it seeing as Harley had decided to keep him company.

Harley sat on the side of the desk her legs crossed and smiling seductively batting her big blue eyes. She was wearing her Harlequin suit but had removed her hat, mask and make-up so she looked normal and her hair was lose.

Joker KNEW she was there but was in no mood for her games at the moment he was desperately trying to think of a way to get Batman off his tail after the last face off they had.

"Puddin" Harley cooed sweetly batting her blue eyes again. She was DESPERATE for some affection she had been a really good girl but he had been neglecting her since last week when they were attacked by Batman.

"Not now Harley" The Joker grumbled crossly. He did enjoy her body now and again when he need an outlet for his needs or if he needed a punching bag but in no way did it mean anything.

Harley pouted but wasn't about to give up she crawled off the desk and stood behind his chair and started rubbing his shoulders seductively "C'mon Puddin you've been working REALLY hard all week don't you want a reward?" she teased her blue eyes twinkling mischievously.

The Joker stopped writing and raised an eyebrow "You REALLY want to give me a reward?" he said peering at her but not getting up.

"Sure I do you know I APPRECIATE all you do Puddin" Harley said ruffling his hair lovingly.

The Joker smirked she really was an odd girl but she did have her uses for some tasks even if she was a whiney brat who was a pain in the ass. He turned to face her and patted his lap to which she sat down and wrapped her arms around his neck.

Harley pressed herself against him seductively hoping to arouse him but he said nothing. He was a very tough nut to crack and sometimes she never really knew what he was thinking. But no matter what it was her job to help out with tasks and keep him happy.

The Joker tilted her chin and smiled "Maybe later pooh when it's time for bed but daddy's busy right now" he said and shoved her off his lap so she landed on her butt on the floor.

Harley moaned crossly rubbing her sore butt "But Puddin..." she whined pouting.

Joker frowned "If you UNDERSTAND a word I just said then get your ass upstairs and STAY there until I come up!" He snapped angrily.

"Y...Yes sir" Harley stammered and ran upstairs she was about to grab her mask and hat when Joker stopped her.

"No Harls leave your mask and hat OFF" Joker said firmly. They were part of her look but she did look kinda cute the way she was now.

"O-Kay" Harley said unsure of what was going on bit didn't dare disobey.

After Harley had dispersed to the bedroom The Joker sighed crossly running his hand through his hair "Stupid dame" he muttered crossly.


	2. C2: Raging war of passion

The Joker sighed heavily he was sat in his office drinking whiskey enjoying his own company. He was in a foul mood after he and Harley had a fight because he wouldn't take her out on a date because they were low on cash and because he was plotting another heist.

Suddenly the radio began playing another song but he didn't care he was too peeved to turn it off and sometimes listening to pop garbage helped him feel a little better when he poked fun at the lyrics.

_"You and I go hard at each other like we're going to war"_

"Aint that the truth" Joker muttered crossly. He and Harley fought so often now it was becoming a daily routine. Not that he didn't like her ability to fight back since he liked a challenge but she became too much of a pain in the ass.

_"You and I go rough we keep throwing things and slamming the door"_

The Joker frowned and rubbed his sore head. During their fight Harley had not only thrown a hairdryer at him but she had whacked him over the head with her hammer. She had then stormed off to the bedroom to sulk while he went to his office.

_"You and I get so damn dysfunctional we start keeping score"_

The Joker peered over to a tally board in the corner that he kept for when Harley and he fought so far on who was ahead in winning fights in was Harley 15 and Joker 23.

_"You and I get sick, yeah, I know we can't do this no more"_

The Joker poured himself another drink he was TIRED of fighting with Harley all it did was add more problems onto the pile he already had and it kept growing.

_"Yeah, but baby there you go again, there you go again, making me love you"_

The Joker smiled Harley had some kind of trick that when she did something no matter how little it was be it her laugh, her smile or just some gesture he would always forgive her and they would make up.

_"Yeah, I stopped using my head, using my head, let it all go"_

Joker sighed he may have been insane but when it came to business he used his deviousness and intelligence to get what he wanted however when it came to Harley it was like a chaotic mess spiralling out of control. You couldn't fight it so he just went with it I mean what else could you do.

_"Got you stuck on my body, on my body, like a tattoo"_

Joker chuckled when he wasn't plotting schemes or fighting batman he had Harley on his lap or cuddled up against him in bed and she would stick to him like glue. Her kiss marks and scratches were etched onto him and they took a while to heal.

_"And now I'm feeling stupid, feeling stupid, crawling back to you"_

The Joker frowned HE never crawled back to anyone it was more like the other way around. The only time he had gone crawling after Harley was when she went to Ivy's and he decided to take her back but that was a one off.

_"So I'll cross my heart and I hope to die"_

The Joker chuckled how clever to put a nursery rhyme into a song it made him feel a bit better.

_"That I'll only stay with you one more night"_

The Joker frowned that word was had no meaning in their relationship unless you take the exception with him kicking her out every so often.

_"And I know I've said it a million times"_

"A million? Try a thousand buddy" The Joker muttered pouring himself more whiskey.

_"But I'll only stay with you one more night"_

That same line that meant nothing to him but probably would when it came to the part about Harley leaving most of the time.

_Try to tell you "no" but my body keeps on telling you "yes"_

The Joker sighed heavily sex was a common issue with them not in quality but in quantity. He may not have Harley's body very often but when he did he made sure it was unforgettable. The only issue was Harley would pester him for more affection even though he would push her away but in the end he would give in because she would offer him something he couldn't refuse.

_"Try to tell you "stop", but your lipstick got me so out of breath"_

The Joker smiled he would tell Harley NO very clearly that even the Hyena's would understand but when she would start kissing him and stroking his hair he would suddenly become so aroused all he wanted was her.

_"I'll be waking up in the morning, probably hating myself"_

"You have NO idea buddy" Joker muttered crossly. He would wake up at who knows what time and find Harley sleeping peacefully next to him either wearing a red lingerie nightgown her bra and panties or more occasionally nothing at all. When he realized what had happened he would feel like a fool and dress himself then go sulk in his office.

_"And I'll be waking up, feeling satisfied but guilty as hell"_

The Joker became thoughtful after that line. He may feel peeved at himself for losing to Harley's sex appeal but she was very good at her sexual techniques. As the rest of the song continued The Joker began to realize that despite being an annoying bitch she was an incredibly cute girl who would do ANYTHING to please him. He turned off the radio and got up making his way upstairs where his little Harlequin would be hiding and hopefully had stopped sulking at this rate.

**_Upstairs_**

Harley was sat in the bath under the shower's hard spray "Jeez all I wanted was to have a romantic night with Mistah-J why did he have to be so MEAN" she sniffed sadly.

"Oh I don't know pooh maybe coz I like it" a devious voice said from the doorway.

"Puddin!" Harley cried shutting the curtain and hiding "H...How much did you hear?" she muttered worriedly.

The Joker rubbed his chin thoughtfully "Let's see how about ALL of it" he said looking peeved.

Harley pouted "Sorry Puddin I was just REALLY looking forward to it and you treat me so NICE when we go out" she said sadly.

The Joker smirked and locked the bathroom door and started to undress so Harley could hear his clothes ruffling "That's ok Pooh I raised you to be so selfish so I guess I am partly to blame" he said casually.

Harley smiled "Yeah but Puddin if you hadn't I would have never found out that being bad was so much fun" she said softly.

The Joker smiled she pay have been a pain in the ass but she was a real sweetie when it came to flattering him with words "Your such a dear Harls you always say the nicest things" he said and opened the shower curtain to which Harley covered her chest quickly.

He looked rather annoyed "Harley we've been together long enough that I'm used to seeing you nude" he said crossly.

"Sorry Puddin I just got embarrassed since usually we shower separately an all" she said apologetically.

The Joker climbed in and shut the curtain and ten sat behind her his manhood pressing against her beck "Well you aint wrong there perhaps we should try it more often" he said wrapping his arms around her waist.

Harley smiled and turned to face Joker and straddled him "I'd like that Mistah-J" she said stroking his cheek and running her hands through his hair.

"Well c'mere sweets and daddy will give you something else you like" The Joker said smirking. Harley smiled and leaned towards him pressing her breasts against his muscular torso fondly.


	3. C3: Battlefield

The Joker was sat in his office drinking whiskey and listening to the radio. He and Harley had been fighting again and as per usual she had gone to Ivy's for support. He frowned crossly why did she have to be so difficult all the time.

Suddenly the radio began playing another song but he didn't change it as he wasn't bothered and was too pissed to care.

_"I was so high I did not recognize"_

The Joker sighed heavily. Recognize what that his girlfriend was a temperamental bitch who demanded sex 24/7. He may have got a huge rod he loved to brag about but he was more quality than quantity.

_"The fire burning in her eyes" _

The Joker frowned crossly. When Harley got mad she was sometimes cute but he was often afraid of her as well. If she was seriously pissed the glare in her eyes would start to burn him like hot coals.

_"The Chaos that controlled my mind"_

The Joker chuckled and sipped his whiskey. His mind was a storm of unending problems and craziness. Nobody would be able to control him or cure him he was forever broken.

_"Whispered goodbye and she got on a plane"_

Harley had left alright but not in a plane in the Joker's car with Bud and Lou through the front door. The slam of the door had been so loud the noise had echoed through the building.

_"Never to return again"_

The Joker smirked Harley may have left a lot and sometimes spent a week perhaps 3 days with Ivy but she would ALWAYS return. Her roots were buried too deep into her mind to make her leave for good.

_"But always in my heart"_

This annoyed The Joker a great deal. Harley may have been on his mind as someone he cared for somewhat but she was not the only thing his heart desired and that was a fact.

_"This love has taken its toll on me"_

"That's for damn sure" The Joker grumbled. He may enjoy Harley's company and the screw sessions they had but her needs and her constant affection was becoming annoying.

_"She said goodbye too many times before"_

The Joker groaned. Harley had always had these moments where she would yell at him and say how she was through but would come back again 3 days later.

_"And her heat is breaking in front of me"_

The Joker felt a sharp pain in his chest. When Harley cried it tore his heart to pieces and made him hate himself.

_"I have no choice coz I won't say goodbye anymore"_

Choice to do what? Make Harley leave for good or kill her they were 2 options he had on his cards either that or chain her to the wall.

_"I tried my best to feed her appetite"_

"Don't I know it" The Joker grumbled. He fucked Harley raw whenever possible but she always seemed to be hungry for more.

_"Keep her coming every night"_

Harley was more kinky than himself in that respect. She would press herself against him and even go as far to wear lingerie when he was working just to get him to have sex.

_"So hard to keep her satisfied"_

The Joker chuckled as he thought about Harley and their intimacy. Often times they had just had an intense fuck but 20 minutes later she would pester him for more and it got down right annoying.

_"Kept playing love like it was just a game"_

Harley was indeed deeply in love with him and The Joker knew that without a doubt. But with her he did CARE for her but he tended to tease her a little with the affection because he liked her reaction.

_"Pretending to feel the same"_

The Joker frowned. He may enjoy messing with Harley but his feelings for her were in no way PRETEND and neither were hers.

_"Then turn around and leave again"_

Harley would always get moody if she felt he wasn't being sincere with his affections and she would storm out and go to Ivy's. It was a pain in the ass but at least he had some peace and quiet for a while.

The Chorus continued to play again and he began to think about how he and Harley fought too often when they could be kicking Batman and boy blunders butt. She may have been annoying from time to time but Harley proved useful too.

_"I'll fix these broken things"_

The Joker smiled whenever he ended up beating Harley he would always tend to her injuries and stay with her until she was better. She was his little doll who stayed loyal until the very end and smiled at him through the good and bad.

_"Repair you broken wings"_

At times Harley had been so powerful and dangerous she almost outdid him but he would put her in her place. But even when she was lost he would show her the way again and she would become her normal self again.

_"And make sure everything's alright"_

The Joker wasn't one for showing sympathy but he was gentle and kind to Harley rarely when she was deeply upset and console her until those tears went away.

_"My pressure on your hips"_

The Joker smirked. He began to image pressing his groin against Harley's crotch and using his hands upon her waist to keep her still. Her slutty voice was amazing and she would cry out so loud.

_"Sinking my fingertips"_

The Joker laughed. Harley's pussy got so wet that her body allowed his fingers entrance without a fight. She enjoyed the feel of his fingers as much as his dick rubbing against her.

_"Into every inch of you"_

Be it her ass, her pussy or her mouth Harley loved his fingertips inside her body. She would moan and beg him to do it harder and faster. The image of her lustful face made The Joker lick his lips.

_"Cause I know that's what you want me to do"_

There was wasn't a yes or no answer Harley loved The Joker's touch better than anything else on the face of this earth. It wasn't just what she WANTED it was what she desired, dreamed of, yearned for even.

The chorus continued on and The Joker began to realize that this song made sense to he and Harley's more intimate part of their relationship. They would talk about it when she came home that evening (hopefully).

**_That evening_**

Harley walked in through the front door and dropped her bags sighing heavily. She had missed her home and The Joker a great deal. Suddenly Bud and Lou came running up to her and licking her face lovingly "Hi babies" She cooed stroking their heads.

After petting them lovingly Harley decided to see her Puddin but she decided to clean her face off first. She made her way into the kitchen and cleaned off her make-up and removed her mask and hat. She looked in the mirror and sighed heavily. The bunches were cute but she they were hurting her head so she untied them allowing her hair to fall to her shoulders. Harley scratched her head as her long blonde locks fell to her shoulders.

"Time to see my Puddin" She sighed lovingly and made her way to his office. She had missed her lover and his warmth a great deal. Ivy was a good friend and was always good to her but she could NEVER replace the Joker.

**_In office_**

The Joker was looking at Harley's picture on his desk. She had a big smile on her face and was in her cute Harlequin number. He sighed heavily thinking about how boring it was without her around.

Suddenly there was a knock at the door "Enter" The Joker said firmly knowing full well who it would be.

"I'm home Puddin" Harley said lovingly batting her blue eyes at him.

The Joker smiled she only ever removed her make-up on special occasions and in this case it was acceptable. He gestured her to come to him with his index finger a huge grin on his face.

Harley walked up to him and stood beside his desk obediently awaiting permission to get close to him. She hugged herself nervously in case he yelled at her which she disliked.

The Joker opened his arms to her "C'mere pooh" he said lovingly.

Harley sat on his lap lovingly and wrapped her arms around his neck. He was so warm and smelled of his cologne "I missed you Mistah-J" she sighed.

"Me too Harls" The Joker said patting her head gently.


	4. C4: In too deep

"N...Now calm down Puddin" Harley stammered nervously grabbing a fake swordfish for protection. She backed away from the furious clown who stepped closer and closer every minute.

"You've FORGOTTEN what I told you a long time ago" The Joker snarled angrily. His whole body was trembling with rage.

Harley stared at him with fear her eyes getting so big she thought they would break. She was so scared she was starting to feel sick. It was never a good sign when her Puddin got angry.

"You're always pulling shots from people who just don't get the joke!" He raged and pulled the swordfish from her grip and slammed the tail into her stomach.

Harley was sent flying out the window and into the cold hard street below. A loud crash was heard a little while later.

"...And don't call me Puddin" The Joker said crossly dropping the swordfish. He moved the chain from above the piranha tank and then shot the chain so it broke.

Batman continued to frown at him crossly. Not only was he selfish, cold hearted, murdering psycho but he was also a manipulative jerk to women.

"Look Batsy it's no fun unless I kill you MYSELF so I'll just be leaving now" he said grinning widely and then left whistling cheerily.

After The Joker had left Batman used a lock pick to free himself of the chains. He walked towards the shattered window where Harley had fell to her doom. As well as thinking her a fool he also pitied her she had just been another victim to The Joker's games.

He shot his bat rope gun at the building opposite and then jumped lowering himself to where Harley had landed. When he finally reached her he couldn't help but feel pity and sadness towards the woman.

She was sprawled across the ground upon 2 broken metal trashcans which had most likely shattered her ribs. Her body was twitching slightly from the shock of the fall and blood was trickling from her mouth.

"Harleen" Batman said firmly but in a concerned tone.

Harley's eyes opened slowly and she peered at the Dark Knight weakly "Batman...".

"I called an ambulance to take you to hospital" Batman said kneeling beside her for company so she wouldn't be scared.

Harley smiled sadly "Y...You were right bats...I am a fool...I was played" She said tears spilling over sadly staining her white face paint.

Batman knew being brutally honest was the only way to help this woman even though he knew it would be painful. But in his eyes The Joker was incapable of ANY feelings unless they were evil.

**_At Hospital_**

"Will she be ok?" Batman asked gazing at the injured woman from her ward window.

"She'll live but she was VERY lucky with a fall like that but the scarring may take longer" The doctor said.

"She was SCARRED?!" Batman said shocked. He knew The Joker beat Harley but never knew she didn't tend to them.

"Not physically...but EMOTIONALLY" The Doctor said walking away to check on other patients.

Batman looked sadly at Harleen. She was finally her normal self with any foolish thoughts of The clown prince gone from her mind but at least she knew the truth.

Her head was fully wrapped in a gauze of bandages, a neck brace around her throat and her arm in a sling. Her left eye was bruised and she had a bandage wrapped across her chest under her clothes.

Batman decided to leave and give her some personal time with her thoughts. She needed time to get over him and to come to her sanity but it would take time; a lot of time.

Harley bowed her head angrily she had been played the fool and been manipulated through her feelings and trust which enraged her. "No more Joker...No more craziness I finally see that slime for what he is a cruel, sadistic manipulative..." she said and peered at her desk her eyes widening in shock.

On the desk was a thin white vase with a single rose sitting in it. There was a tag around the stalk with a message on it.

_"Get better soon-J x"_

"Angel..." She said sighing lovingly. Her heart oozed love all over again for the charming clown prince.

**_At funnibone warehouse_**

The Joker sat at his desk writing blueprints for his next scheme to destroy batman. He sighed heavily as he thought about Harley.

"Stupid girl she never learns" he grumbled crossly. He remembered how hard she had hit the floor when he pushed her "She better pull through she's useful" he muttered.

He remembered the rose he sent and smiled. She may have been an annoying pest but she was cute and a hard worker plus loyal and clever something you don't find in most girls.

"My little Harlequin" he said smiling to himself as he remembered her cute face when he praised her.


	5. C5: Joker's toys

**Hey guys I kinda always liked this episode of Batman Adventures so I did my own take of what I wanted to happen. ENJOY!**

* * *

The Joker was sat at his worktable dripping explosive liquids into his flower. He was grateful that Harley wasn't there as he could concentrate more but this silence was to be short lived.

"MISTAH-J, MISTAH-J!" Harley cried fearfully running up to The Joker and grabbing him.

The Joker was taken by surprise and lost grip of the vial to which he fumbled with it for several minutes eventually catching it in his grasp. He breathed a long sigh of relief if he had dropped it all hell would have broke loose.

He turned to Harley crossly "You nearly blew us to Chattahoochee" he said angrily. She had better have a good reason for disturbing him in such a manner.

"You gotta save me Puddin he's after me!" Harley said fearfully clinging to him for protection. She was shaking like a leaf and her heart was racing like a jackhammer.

The Joker was unimpressed by her excuse but he KNEW her well. Harley was many things but a liar she most certainly was NOT. He leaned his elbow upon his desk resting his fist under his chin still gripping the vial of liquids in his left hand.

He peered at her with a pissed off expression "And who precisely would that be?" he said firmly.

Suddenly there was a huge crash and a yellow skinned weirdo with green hair, a giant red boa wearing red gloves and boots with a black hem came bursting in. The rest of him was naked apart from a pair of green and black men's underwear.

The loud crash scared both Harley and Joker causing him to almost drop his vial again.

"Harley I'm hoooome!" The guy yelled loudly with a wide toothy grin.

"Him!" Harley whimpered clinging to The Joker tightly.

The Joker turned around and got to his feet his expression somewhat shocked. He didn't know where to look the guy was barely clothed save his gaudy underwear.

The Creeper approached the pair grinning "Wow it does strike fear into the hearts of criminals".

The Joker was not amused first of all Harley had interrupted him when he was working and second some yellow lunatic wearing practically nothing had just burst into his home and created a large hole in his wall which would probably cost a fortune.

The Joker folded his arms not amused by the situation and mess that had been caused. He peered at Harley who was cowering behind him raising an eyebrow expecting an explanation.

Harley dodged from side to side behind him "He's the Creep whose stealing your act".

The Joker stood there silently but he was insulted that this fashion reject who looked like Tarzan on acid was HIS new rival. The guy could have at least worn something less revealing and more fashionable it would give him a bad name.

The Creeper grinned deviously eyeing Harley "And that's not all Mr. Happy". He then grabbed Harley by the headdress yanking her from her hiding place behind The Joker "I'm stealing your girl too".

The Joker frowned un amused. If there was one thing that every criminal in Gotham knew it was that Harley was HIS. Nobody was allowed to have her and that was his the law. The fact that this guy dared to touch her let alone try and claim her proved he was a fucking moron.

The Creeper licked Harley's face to which she winced with displeasure. This guy was WAY too clingy and not to mention a pervert. She may enjoy being petted and occasionally screwed but only by THE JOKER.

"I swear Mistah-J I didn't encourage him" Harley said struggling to escape. Her expression was very displeased and uncomfortable.

The Joker's temper had just gone from reasonable to infuriated. Not only did this guy not only was a humiliation of a villain but he was an idiot for trying to steal HIS woman.

He reached out and grabbed Harley's headdress and pulled her towards him so she landed on his chest.

Harley peered up at him with her big blue eyes gazing up at him fondly. This man was the type she liked cool and good looking with a good fashion sense with a deadly mind.

The Joker grinned holding her by the arm with one hand his other still gripping her headdress "That's ok Pooh I know you're a one man loon".

Harley squealed happily. She was pleased her Puddin believed her and didn't think she was a ditzy blonde who liked to sleep around.

The Joker then looked at The Creeper frowning. This man needed to be taught a lesson on not fucking around with his toys let alone trying to steal his style.

He tossed Harley to one side so she was hiding behind him again. He walked closer to The Creeper his eyes filled with rage a huge frown on his face flashing his white teeth.

"There's only room for one clown prince in this town" he said angrily. He grabbed his vial of explosive liquids in his right hand.

"How would you like an paid expense trip to metropolis..." he said grinning wickedly his dark eyes gleaming as he raised his hand with the chemicals in it "...On air nitro".

**_Outside_**

There was a large explosion to which the roof was blown up and the warehouse was a total mess.

**_Inside_**

Harley was laid upon some large toy blocks in a sprawled position. She moaned gently the blast had knocked her about a bit and she felt a little dizzy.

The Creeper approached her slowly gazing at her slender figure and beautiful frame. Even under all that make-up she was a real babe he just had to have her.

Suddenly a large wad of electricity shot through his body to which he yelled loudly jittering like a fool then collapsed to the floor.

"Close enough ugly" The Joker snarled angrily.

"M...Mistah-J" Harley said weakly coming to.

"Get behind me" The Joker said firmly to which she obeyed and clung to The Joker for protection.

"Aw c'mon baby I just wanna play" The Creeper said playfully coming to.

The Joker had heard enough he grabbed the Creeper by the throat angrily his grip tightening "Listen here you ugly yellow dipshit!" The Joker hissed fiercely.

Harley was rather touched by The Joker's protective attitude towards her. She felt so lucky to have a guy so dedicated to her that she wanted to cry.

"Harley is MINE!" The Joker snapped "...She belongs to ME not you...ME" The Joker continued his eye filled with rage. "I don't know who the fuck you think you are trying to take her for yourself but I can tell you thing you don't stand a chance" He said grinning widely.

"Aw Puddin" Harley said sighing happily clutching her hands together and holding them close to her chest.

The Joker dropped The Creeper finally and then kicked him in the face "If you even TOUCH her again let alone LOOK at her I'll dump you in a vat of acid and feed your remains to the Hyena's" he snarled.

"Puddin..." Harley said quietly from her hiding place behind him.

The Joker smiled "C'mere pooh" he said holding out his arms.

Harley leapt into his embrace happily squealing as she did so. She wrapped her arms around his chest clinging to him tightly.

"You see Creepo my Harley needs a man who can satisfy her needs and make her feel alive" The Joker said smirking. "And all you are is a fucked up Halloween costume gone wrong and your package isn't even all that to brag about" He said chuckling.

"Mistah-J you know me so well" Harley sighed happily.

"Of course pooh your my alter ego, my twin, my little princess" The Joker said lovingly.

The Creeper frowned why was such a babe stuck with a boring, less colourful and bossy guy it just didn't make sense.

Harley batted her eyelashes at The Joker "Puddin..." she said lovingly.

"Hmmm?" The Joker said patting her head.

"...Kiss me" she said smiling.

The Joker smirked now that was something he would do happily to rub in this guys face. He leaned towards her and kissed her deeply even entering his tongue to show how submissive and obedient Harley was.

Afterwards he peered around "Well Pooh this place is ruined wanna help me find some new digs?" he said smirking.

"Sure thing Puddin" Harley said fondly.


	6. C6: Your creation

Harley was sat on the bed wearing her Harlequin costume but had removed her hat and mask along with her make-up. She and Joker had gotten into another fight resulting in him driving to the local bar to get wasted.

She couldn't understand why he HATED her so much. Her entire look and creation was something he awakened within her when they first met so why did he insult her and blame her all the time. The radio began playing a sad and painful song that made her think deeply about herself and what she had become through his thorough training and mind control.

_"I'm tired of being what you want me to be"_

Harley sighed sadly ever since she had joined with The Joker he had always scolded her when she did something wrong and pushed her away if she tried to get close to him. In truth he just saw her as a cute face that should be obedient.

_"Feeling so faithless, lost under the surface"_

Long ago Harley had some faith in their relationship but that had gone now along with her happiness. The real girl she was no longer existed and she was merely a shadow of a psychopathic killer.

_"Don't what you're expecting of me"_

The Joker would say he wanted Harley to be a killer but when she tried to kill Batman he would beat her senseless calling her an idiot. If he said a comment that he wanted to go to bed she would wait for him but instead of sleeping with her he just turned away and ignored her.

_"Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes"_

The Joker was so good at what he did all she wanted was for him to be proud of her but no matter what she did he seemed to just get pissed at her. She couldn't help but make some mistakes it was part of being human.

_(Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow)_

Often she felt like she was drowning from the amount of things he asked of her not to mention everyone else's judgements on her behaviour. It was all so much she felt like she was drowning from the weight.

_"Every step that I take is another to mistake to you"_

Harley would come up with one idea only to have him yell at her for trying to steal his thunder and if she tried doing something for herself he would beat her senseless.

_(Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow)_

Those words yet again reminding her of all her mistakes and peer pressure of others that never seemed to leave her alone. Was it too much to ask for some approval or praise for once in her life?

_"I've become so numb, I can't feel you there"_

It was true. The Joker was never around or so cold to her that she felt emotionally numb and could no longer feel like he was around her. All she heard was the noise that came from his mouth when he was mad.

_"Become so tired, so much more aware"_

Harley was tired all right; tired of the pressure, the yelling, the abuse and the lies. She had come to realize she meant nothing to The Joker but he meant something to her.

_"I'm becoming this, all I want to do"_

Harley didn't know what she wanted to do anymore. Her thoughts were so scrambled she couldn't think clearly and just wanted to cry.

_"Is be more like me and be less like you"_

Harley's eyes widened in shock as those words filled her mind. She was becoming more and more of what the Joker wanted every day. Her dreams of being a normal girl with a family was fading fast close to none existent.

_"Can't you see that your smothering me"_

The Joker asked so much of Harley and was always in her face that she could hardly breath. She was suffocating under his grasp that it hurt to even think about him.

_"Holding too tightly, afraid to lose control"_

When she tried to leave Joker would stop her and yank her back in with his tight vice like grip; She still had the marks on her body from their last argument. He was so desperate to keep her under his control that he wasn't thinking about her well being.

_"Cause everything you thought I would be"_

What had he wanted her to be the list was endless in her mind. Lover, Hench wench, punching bag, slave? She just didn't know anymore it was all a big mess.

_"Has fallen apart right in front of you"_

Whatever he had wanted her to be was gone. She was merely a shadow of his female alias now who tried to do her best to make him happy.

_(Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow)_

Again those words reminded her of how she was drowning under the suffering of her own emotional turmoil and physical abuse. His demands seemed no longer realistic and just plain mad but that was to be expected from The Joker.

_"Every step that I take is another mistake to you"_

Everything she did was not good enough for him. She was never smart enough, not sexy enough, not fast enough and above all not obedient enough. She tried god damn it but he all he did was ridicule her.

_(Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow)_

Yes she was drowning in his demands, abuse, cruelty and rage. She just couldn't seem to please him at all and it was killing her.

_"And every second I waste is more than I can take"_

Harley was wasting every moment she could having spending time with Ivy on a man who no longer appreciated her let alone loved her. It was tearing her apart in side and could no longer hide her sadness.

The chorus played on and Harley began to think that this song made her think more seriously of what she meant to Joker and if he even cared about her. She had only ever wanted to make him proud but that was questionable now.

_"And I know"_

Harley knew a lot of things. If she was given the time she could write a book on all the thoughts that filled her mind.

_"I may end up failing too"_

Harley was always failing his expectations and she hated it. She broke every bone in her body trying to please him and he still didn't thank her or show appreciation.

_"But I know"_

Know what that the mean she loved would never take her seriously. Tell her he loved her; but her nice things, settle down and start a family with her. The list was endless and never ending.

_"You were just like me with someone disappointed in you"_

The Joker was always trying to make Batman smile or laugh but he never did. So far the only one capable of making Batman laugh was her because of her so called foolishness.

The chorus played on and Harley grabbed her pillow tightly for comfort. She felt that her attempts would never please The Joker and there was only one way to make him truly happy.

**_That evening_**

"Harley daddy's home" The Joker called. Nobody answered which annoyed him greatly "She's probably just sulking" he muttered.

He went into the kitchen to grab a beer and found a note on the table. He opened it reading it slowly.

_Dear Mistah-J_

_I'm sorry I couldn't live up to your expectations or make you proud of me._

_I guess that's just one of my disadvantages that won't change._

_Hopefully this time I will have made you smile even if it hurts me_

_Take care of the babies for me_

_All my love forever_

_Harley x_

The Joker went quiet as he read it then his eyes snapped open and he rushed upstairs to the bedroom. She wasn't on the bed but her Harlequin suit was along with her mask and hat.

Suddenly he noticed the hallway carpet was wet to which he dashed to the bathroom nearly slipping on the tiles.

Harley was in the bathtub with the water overflowing. Tears stained her face and there was a knife on the floor stained in blood. Her left wrist was slit and blood was staining the water.

"HARLEY!" The Joker cried turning off the water and pulling her out not caring about his clothes getting wet. He held her close to him clutching her frail body in his arms close to tears. He never meant to push her this far. It was just how he was he couldn't CHANGE his personality but he could make exceptions.

"Hold on...PLEASE for my sake" He begged as the tears began to fall slowly down his white skin.

**_Later_**

Harley came to slowly. She peered around the room and found she was lying in bed wearing nothing. Her wrists was bandaged tightly but she had not the faintest idea why.

"Harley? Thank god!" The Joker cried pulling her close to him and holding her tightly.

Harley was confused he was CRYING. But why didn't he hate her and wish for her to die "Mistah-J I don't understand?" she said quietly.

"Why did you try and kill yourself you fool?!" He said bitterly a hint of rage in his voice. He was holding her by the shoulders now and staring into her blue eyes intently.

Harley gazed back into his black eyes the pupils burning her. She swallowed nervously "So I could make you happy" she said quietly.

The Joker was stunned his words had pushed her to the point of death. He didn't MEAN to hurt her but he wasn't capable of love or kindness "Your death would NEVER make me happy Harley" he said firmly.

Harley was shocked if he didn't want her dead then what did he want. There was only so much she could do to finally make him smile.

"I know I'm a heartless bastard but not having you around wouldn't make life any easier" he said hugging her again.

Harley clung to him tightly the tears spilling over "Mistah-J I'm sorry...I'm sorry" she sobbed.

The Joker held her tightly. Never again would he be so cruel of course he would yell at her but he wouldn't push her close to death's grip anymore.


	7. C7: Twisted love

Harley was sat on the bed sighing heavily. She had been injured in another fight with Joker and although her injuries pained her greatly but it also felt arousing to touch them as the pain filled her body.

_"Just gonna stand there and watch me burn"_

The Joker no matter what kind of terrible peril she was in would always watch her as she was ensnared with the flames while making his escape.

_"But that's alright because l like the way it hurts"_

In a strangely sadistic way Harley got aroused by the pain and she even enjoyed it a little. Other people would call that weird but what was so great about being normal.

_"Just gonna stand there and hear me cry"_

When Harley cried most days The Joker would ignore her like she wasn't even there. If she got REALLY annoying he would even chuck her into the street.

_"But that's all right because I love the way you lie"_

His lies may have hurt her emotionally but they made him unpredictable and sneaky which was what Harley was somewhat attracted to. Others called that being a sleazebag and a jerk but she called it intriguing.

_"I love the way you lie"_

Harley did love the way he lied because he was so good at it. If they were having sex he would say things like "This won't hurt a bit" when in fact it hurt like a mother.

**_Downstairs_**

Joker was sat in his office smoking a cigar and drinking booze. It was a pain in the ass when he and Harley fought but in order to get her to obey certain measures had to be taken.

_"I can't tell you what it really is"_

He didn't know what love was as that word was a mystery to him. He was however learning about kindness and that was thanks to Harley. Though he only showed it to her and the hyena's but nobody else saw this side of him.

_"I can only tell you what it feels like"_

The feelings he had for Harley were a pain in the ass. The fact that he was allowing himself to care for someone made his chest ache and feel like a pathetic loser who had lost his edge. Yet somehow having her in his life made him feel like the luckiest guy around.

_"And right now there's a steel knife in my windpipe"_

It hurt so much to LOVE Harley that he felt like shit about it. But somehow he enjoyed the pain despite disliking her company most of the time.

_"I can't breathe but I still fight while I can fight"_

Harley clung to him like glue and her affection swamped him. He fought to stay a cruel heartless murderer but she was CHANGING him and he was not happy about it.

_"As long as the wrong feels right it's like I'm in flight"_

Beating Harley and making her feel like shit made him feel good often times he wanted to laugh at her but didn't.

_"High off her love, drunk from her hate"_

Harley love often made him feel like he was on ecstasy. He had no control over it and it felt like he was another person or his body was not his own. She hated him so much that if it was a fine wine he would have been pissed.

_"It's like I'm huffing paint and I love her the more I suffer, I suffocate"_

It was true the Joker allowed himself to care about Harley the more pain it caused him to feel inside. He was suffocating under her weight of affections and it was too much to bare after all he wasn't rumoured for his kindness.

_"And right before I'm about to drown, she resuscitates me"_

Whenever he was close to death and awaited its arrival Harley would always nurse him back to health so her beaming face would be the first thing he saw. He could never figure out why after all she said she hated him so why did she help him?

_"She fucking hates me and I love it"_

The fact that Harley got upset and would yell at him at what a heartless bastard he was filled him with joy. It made him realize he still had his edge and was a wicked person.

_"Wait where are you going?"_

A frequent question he asked her when she went out. It was either to see Ivy, go shopping or to pet the babies.

_"I'm leaving you"_

The Joker smirked she would always say those 3 words yet she still came crawling back to him begging him to forgive her. He had imbedded his poison into her and she couldn't survive without him.

_"No you aint, come back"_

The Joker sighed heavily he would always say that to her before he dragged her back in by the headdress or her hair. He would never allow her to escape his clutches and go to someone else. She belonged to him and nobody else and that was final.

_"We're running right back"_

Running back to what exactly? Well that was simple. They were running back into more mess caused by their anger and hatred. More fights that ended in tears and hurtful words making them feel guilty afterwards.

_"Here we go again"_

Whenever he and Harley fought most other criminals would say this and then watch them unfold. Or If she said she loved him Ivy would say that to her telling Harley what an asshole he was. Then there was 2-face or Scarecrow who would try and convince him that he had feelings for her which he continued to deny.

_"It's so insane cause when it's going good, it's going great"_

The Joker raised an eyebrow of course he was insane. Falling into a vat of chemicals was hardly a daily routine in one's lifetime. But it was true that when he and Harley were happy they were unstoppable a machine that powered through any roadblock that came their way.

_"I'm Superman with the wind at his back, she's Lois Lane"_

The Joker frowned NEVER would he be superman and Harley was certainly not Lois Lane. What he was would always be "The Clown Prince of Crime" or "Ace of Knaves". Harley was now known as "Harlequin of Hell" which had quite a nice ring to it.

_"But when it's bad its awful, I feel so ashamed I snapped"_

He couldn't have agreed more. When they were at each other's throats it was a pain in the ass and more shit he didn't need. Sometimes he did feel bad for hurting Harley the way she did after all she tried her best and was a good little trouper.

_"Who's that dude?"_

The Joker clenched his fists angrily a small angry growl escaping his lips. It infuriated him when other men looked at her or even tried to touch her. It was bad enough that Ivy was trying to coax her into becoming her partner in crime.

_"I don't even know his name"_

Sure he did and it was fucking ridiculous. The Creeper would forever try and lay his hands on HIS woman. She already said no and she was somewhat afraid of the guy now since he tried to rape her.

_"I laid hands on her, I'll never stoop so low again"_

Now that was a promise he wasn't always going to be able to keep. Pain was the only thing he knew on how to teach her a lesson. It was what he called "Tough love" and it worked rather well in his case.

_"I guess I don't know my own strength"_

The Joker looked at his hands and then touched his arms slightly. He wasn't exactly a bodybuilder or Mr. Muscle like Creeper or Batman but he was no pushover.

**_Upstairs_**

_"Just gonna stand there and watch me burn"_

Harley clung tighter to her pillow. Joker never helped her when she was in danger he just watched her suffer his iconic grin spread across her face.

_"But that's alright because I like the way it hurts"_

She wasn't going to lie. Harley was aroused by the pain when it filled her body when they were intimate. Sometimes she hated it but couldn't deny that when she was sitting alone injured she would prod her wounds then wince but just do it again for the pleasure.

_"Just gonna stand there and hear me cry"_

Harley would stand in the dark sobbing her heart out but he would just watch from a distance with his large smirk on her face. Either that or would get pissed off and tell her to stop being such a cry-baby.

_"But that's alright because I love the way you lie"_

Just like she always said to herself. Normal men were too predictable and boring and she hated that. Being with The Joker was unpredictable and crazy out of control every day. She would rather be with a man who always surprised her than a guy who was easy to read.

_"I love the way you lie"_

She did love his lies because he was such a sweet one. She could easily tell when he was lying sometimes but not always. And that was what was so great about it he was unpredictable making him the best at what he did.

**_Downstairs_**

_"You ever love somebody so much you can barely breathe when you're with 'em"_

The Joker sighed heavily taking another swig of whiskey. The fact that he was allowing himself to care for Harley was leaving him where he was continuously surprised by what she was able to accomplish yet unable to breath under her clutches of love.

_"You meet and neither one of you even know what hit 'em"_

Joker had no warning when he met Harley let alone that he would begin to care about her. He had originally planned to merely use her as a tool for escaping he didn't know she would become his accomplice.

_"Got that warm fuzzy feeling"_

Somehow when Harley smiled or did something sweet for him he DID feel a slight fuzzy feeling inside. He had no idea what caused it and the more it showed itself it pissed him off a great deal.

_"Yeah, them chills you used to get 'em"_

When Harley did something amazing it did give him the chills. He had no idea she was capable of those things and it surprised him.

_"Now you're getting fucking sick of looking at 'em"_

Harley was becoming an eyesore. She was forever annoying him when he was working on another plan. She was a needy little bitch who was constantly begging for affection or his rough love.

_"You swore you'd never hit 'em; never do nothing to hurt 'em"_

The Joker was not one to keep promises that weren't true. He lied but that was a whole different story. He had his own agenda for taking over Gotham he had no room in his life for stupid girly promises.

_"Now you're in each other's face spewing venom in your words when you spit them"_

There wasn't a day that went by that he wasn't yelling at Harley for making a mistake or doing something wrong. She would even beat him with her hammer sometimes if he even went near another woman. The more this went on the worse the insults became it was a never ending cycle.

_"You push, pull each other's hair, scratch, claw, bit 'em"_

The Joker had pushed Harley out of windows, dragged her by the hair, kicked her, punched her, slapped her endless times. She in return had choked him, pushed him away, scratched his face and one rare time bit his lip when he kissed her.

_"Throw 'em down, pin 'em"_

In order to look her in the face properly he had been forced to pin her down upon the desk and force her to look at him. She had once straddled him and choked him from on top which had been a surprise.

_"So lost in the moments when you're in them"_

That was clearer than day. When he and Harley fought they got so into them they forgot that anyone was watching that they often caused a scene.

_"It's the rage that took over"_

The Joker was forever filled with rage thanks to Batman and Harley. They both tormented and frustrated him that he was never able to just relax.

_"It controls you both"_

The rage that filled their minds was like a drug. It turned them into ugly beasts without any sense of right or wrong all they cared about was ridiculing one another.

_"So they say you're best to go your separate ways"_

That wasn't an option in Joker's mind. She was his hench-girl who was supposed to help him during heists and keep Batgirl and Boy blunder preoccupied.

_"Guess that they don't know you 'cause today that was yesterday"_

Joker had often thought it but never said it to her. It was always so different each day sometimes she was affectionate other days she was a stubborn bitch.

_"Yesterday is over, it's a different day"_

It certainly was a new day. One filled with more anger and hatred and even worse insults that came with it.

_"Sound like broken records playing over but you promised her"_

The lies he told and the fights took place were like a song that repeated itself over and over. Never stopping always going on and on growing worse every day.

_"Next time you show restraint"_

He could try and show restraint but he had no idea how he would react to Harley's actions. She was so unpredictable that his reactions was varied to whatever idea she had or stunt she pulled.

_"You don't get another chance"_

"That's where your wrong chump" The Joker said smirking. He had loads of chances to say he was sorry but he just made it so Harley was the obedient one. He did occasionally say it just not to her face.

_"Life is no Nintendo game"_

"Oh but it is dear boy" The Joker chuckled. Life was unpredictable in his forte as far as he was concerned. He could say or do anything he wanted and nobody would see it coming.

_"But you lied again"_

What was new he always lied to Harley it was just part of his personality. He would do it again too and he felt no shame about it.

_"Now you watch her leave out the window"_

He didn't always do it but sometimes he did. The Joker would watch her leave to the weed's place then say "You'll be back" and he was right.

_"Guess that's why they call it window pane"_

His chest did ache a little when she left. She was good company and rather cute too. She was becoming a female persona of him but what angered him was she was becoming better than him.

The rest of the song continued playing and it made him realize just how twisted and cruel their whole relationship was. They weren't perfect but they made it work somehow. It was strange but they were stronger than Ivy and 2-face which made a difference in his eyes.

**_That evening_**

Harley was laid on the bed upon her side tears spilling down her cheeks. She was in love with a manipulative, lying psychopath yet she liked it. She smiled sadly "I suppose I'm a sadist".

"That's what I've been saying for years" The Joker said from the doorway.

"Mistah-J?" She said worriedly in case he was going to hurt her again.

He sighed heavily sitting next to her on the bed. He looked at her injuries and sighed crossly "You got blood on the bed sheets again Harls".

"Sorry Mistah-J" she said apologetically.

He got up and made his way into the bathroom then came back with a bowl of hot water, bandages and plasters.

She was still wearing her Harlequin suit "Harley your gonna have to change so I can see your wounds" He said firmly.

Harley got up groaning in pain and removed her suit and pulled on a vest top but didn't put on anything else.

The Joker began disinfecting her wounds concentrating deeply "Keep still now" he said firmly.

Harley winced as he cleaned her wounds and applied bandages to her wounds along with plasters on her face where she had cuts. When he was done she peered at them as if they were decorations.

"Get some rest you'll heal faster" he said firmly getting up.

Harley wrapped her arms around him clutching him tightly. Her body was so frail and small as if she would break upon touch.

The Joker took hold of one of her hands gently but instead of removing them as he usually would he held them gently.

"I love you Mistah-J" She said quietly.

"Me too Harls...Me too" He said gently stroking her hands.


	8. C9: Love masked by lies

It was evening and Joker was relaxing in front of the TV with a beer. It had been a long week and he was ready to relax for a change instead of working his ass off to take over Gotham.

Bud and Lou were outside in the alley watching the entrance so nobody got inside without him knowing. He was not a fan of unwanted visitors but the pets got rid of them easily.

Suddenly the door opened and Harley skipped in playfully. She had a giant smile on her face and batted her big blue eyes lovingly.

"Hey Harls" Joker groaned wearily.

Harley leapt onto the sofa and wrapped her arms around his neck lovingly "Hi Puddin I missed you" she cooed sweetly.

The Joker patted her head gently. She was a sweet girl but got annoying sometimes but he never said it.

"Whatcha doing?" Harley asked sweetly.

"Just flicking through channels" he mumbled sleepily.

"You seem stressed Puddin you need a backrub?" Harley cooed gently.

"Thanks for the offer but no thanks" Joker grumbled crossly.

"But I just wanna help" Harley moaned unhappily.

"WHEN I NEED YOU I'LL SAY NOW FUCK OFF!" Joker snapped crossly and pushed her hard.

Losing balance Harley slid backwards and hit the coffee table. She whacked her back hard and left a scrape across her back.

Joker was stunned by his actions and a wave of guilt flooded him. He hadn't mean to hurt her just get some personal space.

Harley sat where she was but looked away clutching her injury. She could feel herself wanting to cry but wouldn't do it in front of him.

"Harley I didn't mean..." Joker said in a pained voice.

Harley got to her feet shakily "It's ok really. You wanted some time alone so I'll got to our room" she said thickly.

Joker spotted the tears in her eyes and her lip wobbling which made him feel worse. He hated it when he made her cry like this.

Harley walked up to the door but before shutting it she said "Goodnight...Joker" she said coldly and left.

The Joker felt a wave of regret from his actions but knew if he went after her now she would only push him away. She needed time to calm her mind from the situation.

**_Upstairs_**

Harley was sat under the spray of the shower letting the water cascade over her like warm rain. It was soothing and helped clear her mind of her troubles.

"Why was Mistah-J so mad at me?" Harley sighed sadly. She had just wanted to help him cheer up since he was feeling rubbish but he had pushed her away.

She could feel her scrapes stinging under the water but she ignored it. They needed cleaning before they got infected and the water would do them good.

"Jay you JERK!" Harley sobbed quietly under the spray of the shower.

All she wanted in life was to be able to be herself. To show her devious, twisted mind and yet her sweet, innocent and loving nature too. But it was impossible since she was always at war with herself and what people expected of her.

Joker wanted her to do what he said and become stronger yet he didn't want her to destroy Batman. He was defensive, selfish, manipulative and devious and apart from being attracted to it she was sick of how he treated her. She wanted a man who loved her and yet was able to treat her well not abuse her.

Ivy was adoring, sweet and caring sure she was bossy and often mean but she showed respect and genuine appreciation for her. Sure her hatred for men was often very intense but she was powerful and dominating without fear of anyone.

Batman was stern, cold, judgemental and strict. He saved her countless times and gave her advice when she needed it. He was often cold and distant to others even her but sometimes showed a genuine concern and kindness towards her but knew how to piss her off.

She had considered cheating on Joker as payback with both of them just to teach him a lesson but something always stopped her. She liked the idea but was never able to make it work somehow.

"What do I want?" Harley sighed heavily. She needed to do something about the situation but was lost at what to choose.

She closed her eyes and let the water cleanse her mind and soul. She needed time to think and get her thoughts in control and understand what she had to do to keep happy.

**_a couple of hours later_**

Harley was packing the car with her suitcases and her criminal tools and gear. She had no doubt in her mind what she was doing and knew that it would help her heal.

"Harley what the hell are you doing?" Joker yelled crossly storming in.

"Oh...Hi Mistah-J" Harley said casually and continued to pack the car.

"Don't oh hi me! Where are you going?" Joker snapped crossly.

"I'm going to Red's for a while I'll call of course but I can't promise I'll remember" Harley said calmly.

"WHY?!" Joker demanded bitterly. He didn't understand what was going on or why she was doing this but he would get to the bottom of this.

Harley turned to him with a solemn look "I know your frustrated Jay and I understand that. But I need to know what I want for myself and I need to get a break from all our problems. I'm tired of meeting 2 sides of you that are sweet and happy 1 minute and a total arsehole the next" she declared.

Suddenly she whistled loudly to which Bud and Lou came running and leapt into the back of the car. She patted their heads lovingly and closed the boot "See ya Jay I wish you the best" she said contentedly.

"Harls wait a..." Joker said firmly.

Harley turned the engine and sped away into the night. She wasn't going to stoop to his level nor was she going to kiss his ass. She was going to be free and enjoy herself until the next time she actually felt she was needed and respected.

Joker stood in the cold night air and was stunned. She had left him but was more confident than before and was worried she may never come back. A loud groan escaped his lips and he muttered "Shit" quietly.


End file.
